Is there really such a thing as Procrastination?
Here I am on my band wagon again. I had a client ask me if I thought they were procrastinating. Why is it we have to have labels of who we are and what we do?
What is my answer to the client? Well I said,” No”.
I mean, there is something stopping them from doing what they want to finish off. Most likely, when I run out of steam, I’ve lost my inspiration or sense of “flow” in what I was doing. OR I’m terrified of what will happen. Will I succeed or fail or worse, what if I don’t WANT to succeed. Reasons, reasons, reasons.
It’s what I do for a living. You know how you decide you want to move from Point A to Point B. There is a gap there. You fill it up with information, knowledge, skills tools, advice, and step by step procedure on how to fill that gap and walk over to the other side. I like to stir up that gap and let all those reasons float to the top.
If you have “bought into” or actually bought a product or service, you have if from the best authority that these steps of skills and tools are guaranteed to work. There are all sorts of testimonials saying it works. You are all excited because THIS is the moment. This is when you get to where you want to go. It doesn’t matter what Point A or Point B is. It could be you’re overweight and you want to be slim. It could be your relationship is on a downward spiral and you want to get it back to where it was. It could even be you want your business to make more money, get more clients. It doesn’t really matter what it is. You have all this knowledge and you’re “procrastinating”.
I am more interested in how it feels. I’m more interested in how often you think about this. How committed are you to getting from point A to B. Because really, I have not clue what will work for you. I have nothing that follows a direct line from A to B with all the steps outlined for you.
I don’t have a plan of attack because I don’t know what works for you. I assume you are an intelligent human being that is dissatisfied with something in your life. What I do know is your whole life is a set of experiences and events that have shaped the way your mind thinks and operates around your behavior. It’s how you perceive what is happening to your life.
So, if anything it’s not really procrastination that is stopping you. More likely it’s just your brain misfiring. It gets all excited about taking new action but the steps, skills and tools just don’t click with how your mind thinks and works. Remember all those testimonials? Well that step by step process you just bought into worked for them because it fit in nicely with how their brain is hardwired. It works for them and because their brain “likes” the whole process it allows that person to stay inspired, keep up the excitement and maintain the flow to reach their goal.
Your brain, on the other hand, just doesn’t work that way and it misfires. You come screaming to a halt. It immediately makes up all these reasons about why you can’t proceed or just plain old: don’t feel like it. Your brain doesn’t have a connection with the whole process. It just doesn’t ring true for you.
Where does the excitement come from? It comes back to that idea about perceptions. It could be a million things that get you excited. Your excitement is as unique to you as a fingerprint. But it isn’t sustainable.
However, a more immediate issue is, “What do I do now?. You’ve got this process you’re not excited about any more. If you’ve invested money, my best suggestion is to make the process your own. If you have a way of doing things that really gets your juices flowing then do it.
Does art bring things alive for you? Then do some drawing of how you want to work it out. Do you need to make short term goals and work towards them? Then set it up that way.
I’ve got tons of assessment tools that I try out myself before I suggest the use to a client. It is a rare occasion that I even suggest this. In every case I have changed how I use it. How do I know when I’m going to have to change it? Well my first clue is that it feels like someone is “telling me how to do something”. I’m a relatively intelligent person and I don’t often need to be told HOW to do something. Its often reminds me of my parents telling me what I can and cannot do. In fact if there is a written comment that I can use the assessment IF I don’t change it in any way when I use it…I hear my dad’s voice in the back of my head.
When I hear that voice I will allow a client to try it out but tell them to change it in any way that feels more comfortable to them. That is IF I even use the assessment.
An example would be a tool I use to determine “values”. What an overused word with a myriad of meanings. This again is another topic for a future article.
I often tell people it really is just a tool to play around with to find out what they are passionate about. It really tells them the elements of their personality. I go through the assessment and ask them how they think they would change that step of the process to reflect who they are and how they think and behave. By the time we are finished they have created a whole new tool and then they are excited about getting down to business.
The bottom line is to create your own process. It doesn’t mean you have to start from scratch. There are many products and services that you can start with and many of them are free at your local library. Cut and paste away and create what works for YOUR mind.
What is my answer to the client? Well I said,” No”.
I mean, there is something stopping them from doing what they want to finish off. Most likely, when I run out of steam, I’ve lost my inspiration or sense of “flow” in what I was doing. OR I’m terrified of what will happen. Will I succeed or fail or worse, what if I don’t WANT to succeed. Reasons, reasons, reasons.
It’s what I do for a living. You know how you decide you want to move from Point A to Point B. There is a gap there. You fill it up with information, knowledge, skills tools, advice, and step by step procedure on how to fill that gap and walk over to the other side. I like to stir up that gap and let all those reasons float to the top.
If you have “bought into” or actually bought a product or service, you have if from the best authority that these steps of skills and tools are guaranteed to work. There are all sorts of testimonials saying it works. You are all excited because THIS is the moment. This is when you get to where you want to go. It doesn’t matter what Point A or Point B is. It could be you’re overweight and you want to be slim. It could be your relationship is on a downward spiral and you want to get it back to where it was. It could even be you want your business to make more money, get more clients. It doesn’t really matter what it is. You have all this knowledge and you’re “procrastinating”.
I am more interested in how it feels. I’m more interested in how often you think about this. How committed are you to getting from point A to B. Because really, I have not clue what will work for you. I have nothing that follows a direct line from A to B with all the steps outlined for you.
I don’t have a plan of attack because I don’t know what works for you. I assume you are an intelligent human being that is dissatisfied with something in your life. What I do know is your whole life is a set of experiences and events that have shaped the way your mind thinks and operates around your behavior. It’s how you perceive what is happening to your life.
So, if anything it’s not really procrastination that is stopping you. More likely it’s just your brain misfiring. It gets all excited about taking new action but the steps, skills and tools just don’t click with how your mind thinks and works. Remember all those testimonials? Well that step by step process you just bought into worked for them because it fit in nicely with how their brain is hardwired. It works for them and because their brain “likes” the whole process it allows that person to stay inspired, keep up the excitement and maintain the flow to reach their goal.
Your brain, on the other hand, just doesn’t work that way and it misfires. You come screaming to a halt. It immediately makes up all these reasons about why you can’t proceed or just plain old: don’t feel like it. Your brain doesn’t have a connection with the whole process. It just doesn’t ring true for you.
Where does the excitement come from? It comes back to that idea about perceptions. It could be a million things that get you excited. Your excitement is as unique to you as a fingerprint. But it isn’t sustainable.
However, a more immediate issue is, “What do I do now?. You’ve got this process you’re not excited about any more. If you’ve invested money, my best suggestion is to make the process your own. If you have a way of doing things that really gets your juices flowing then do it.
Does art bring things alive for you? Then do some drawing of how you want to work it out. Do you need to make short term goals and work towards them? Then set it up that way.
I’ve got tons of assessment tools that I try out myself before I suggest the use to a client. It is a rare occasion that I even suggest this. In every case I have changed how I use it. How do I know when I’m going to have to change it? Well my first clue is that it feels like someone is “telling me how to do something”. I’m a relatively intelligent person and I don’t often need to be told HOW to do something. Its often reminds me of my parents telling me what I can and cannot do. In fact if there is a written comment that I can use the assessment IF I don’t change it in any way when I use it…I hear my dad’s voice in the back of my head.
When I hear that voice I will allow a client to try it out but tell them to change it in any way that feels more comfortable to them. That is IF I even use the assessment.
An example would be a tool I use to determine “values”. What an overused word with a myriad of meanings. This again is another topic for a future article.
I often tell people it really is just a tool to play around with to find out what they are passionate about. It really tells them the elements of their personality. I go through the assessment and ask them how they think they would change that step of the process to reflect who they are and how they think and behave. By the time we are finished they have created a whole new tool and then they are excited about getting down to business.
The bottom line is to create your own process. It doesn’t mean you have to start from scratch. There are many products and services that you can start with and many of them are free at your local library. Cut and paste away and create what works for YOUR mind.
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